Man Prays Wife’s Headache Is Over Before It’s Time to Make Braaibroodjies

PRETORIA — A 48-year-old Pretoria man spent most of Saturday afternoon in prayer after his wife announced she had a headache three hours before the braai.

Kobus Venter had been looking forward to rugby, brandy and a perfectly timed braai when his wife said she wasn’t feeling well and needed to lie down.

“I was sympathetic, obviously,” he said. “I brought her two Panados and a glass of water. I even closed the curtains. But that was at three o’clock. The coals will be ready at six.”

Things grew serious when she showed no sign of recovery by the second half of the Springbok match.

Venter briefly considered making the braaibroodjies himself, but gave up on discovering that the cheese needed grating, the tomatoes needed slicing and nobody had ever told him how much chutney to use.

“I can braai a perfect medium-rare rump with my eyes closed,” he said. “But braaibroodjies are different. There’s a system. And she’s the only one who knows it.”

Friends suggested he simply make them himself, which he described as unnecessarily confrontational.

By 5.30pm he had given up on conventional medicine and gone straight to the Almighty.

At press time, Venter was standing at the kitchen counter, grater in hand, still praying.