The divorced father of three joined several dating apps last month. His profiles specify women aged 21 to 27 who are ‘mature for their age’.
He has since bought a bottle of cologne that cost more than the Corolla’s last service, and a floral shirt that still shows its fold lines. Neither has helped.
‘I’m young at heart,’ he said. ‘People are always shocked when I tell them I’m 54.’
His daughter, 25, has suggested he try women nearer his own age. He called this negativity.
Friends have told him to get a BMW. He believes his personality should be enough, though he has started parking around the corner.
Last week he took a 23-year-old for coffee in Sandton. She asked if he was retired.
The date ended when she offered to set him up with her mother, who is 49 and recently divorced.
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The Hadeda Heckler is a South African satirical news website. Some stories are invented, others are exaggerated and a few are disturbingly close to the truth. Any resemblance to actual government competence or the stupidity of the average man or woman is purely coincidental.
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